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When I’m asking God for guidance, I ask Him to dumb it down for me. I tend to question if it’s God telling me no, or if it’s my own doubts. Is He telling me yes, or is it my own wants that I’m hearing. This has led me to ask God to make His…
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Faith after trauma is difficult, to say the least. We want answers as to why things were allowed to happen to us. Why was evil allowed to take my innocence? Why was my rapist the only one to get me pregnant, only for me to miscarry? Why did my husband have to die? Why couldn’t…
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My mind likes to wonder. I’ve had this problem for as long as I can remember. I will be listening to someone or something, and have several other unrelated thoughts going through my mind at the same time. It’s inconvenient, rude, and frustrating, so I tried to find a way to help myself. At church,…
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Hearing another survivor of assault talk about their experience, their feelings brings on two emotions. On one hand it’s utterly heartbreaking. I always wish I was the only person to ever be assaulted. I wish that somehow I could just take on every other person’s trauma, and nightmares. On the other hand, I feel less…
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In order to build a strong, lasting, intimate relationship with God, we have to realize that He has terms and conditions. Like any good parent, He loves us enough not to spoil us. Sure, He is more than capable of answering all our prayers, completely taking away all our burdens, and letting us just live…
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For the second time this year, I wound up getting sick. This time it was pretty debilitating. Every little movement was exhausting, and painful at times. I am finally recovered, and able to get some writing done. I’m sorry that it’s been so long since I’ve posted, but I promise that in the next couple…
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For the first time since I was in middle school, I was unmedicated. My emotions were difficult to control, and they felt foreign. This was my newest hurdle. I had to learn to feel things in a healthier way. I had to reign in my emotions. With God leading the way, I slowly learned how…
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There is so much going on in our world that it’s led me to have flashbacks about a certain individual, on a certain night. After several days of trying to just move past it, and ignore the pain, I have decided to do what I feel led to. Here is a sick story, with a…
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My thoughts scared me at times, but I wasn’t going to give in. I wasn’t going to give E the satisfaction of breaking me to the point I cut myself, or worse. I wasn’t going to let any of the monsters from my past win, and I certainly wasn’t going to act selfishly, and potentially…
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This year, with God’s grace and guidance, I’ve decided to start putting money into this blog. With new features comes new themes, and I found one I fell in love with. Now comes the fun part, figuring out how to personalize it, and get it perfect for my blog. I know nothing about technology, and…