Being an author has been my dream since I was a little girl. I wanted to write books, be famous, adored, and live in a mansion with lion statues by my front gate. Over the years, and most especially after my last relationship, my dream changed. I wanted to still be an author, but I didn’t want to be famous. I didn’t want to live in a mansion. I wanted to somehow write, and still live a quiet, peaceful life. God had other plans.

Every time I sat down to work on my book, I got writers block. I would sit at my laptop, fingers at the ready, and nothing would happen. I thought that perhaps it’s because I should go old school, and hand write it. So, I had my pen at the ready, and still nothing. Hours would go by, and I had doodles but nothing of substance. I eventually gave up. I packed everything up, and emptiness followed. What do you do when you can’t follow your passion? I was a failure.

A couple of years ago, I was going through a particularly stressful time. I was overwhelmed, and my feelings of being a failure were more prominent than ever. I was seeking God for answers, direction, and purpose. That’s when I started to think about blogging. I’d still be able to help people, meet friends, and network. I wasn’t crazy about the idea, because it would be an end to my quiet, peaceful life. I’d be, hopefully, making a name for myself. But I felt a push to do it, and I knew it wasn’t because I wanted to, but because God wanted me to. My plan was to start my blog around summer of 2024. I would have a backlog of writings to upload on a schedule, and I would start trying to make a little bit of money. Again, God said ‘No’.

Part 2 will be up shortly