God

  • Terms and Conditions pt 14

    My thoughts scared me at times, but I wasn’t going to give in. I wasn’t going to give E the satisfaction of breaking me to the point I cut myself, or worse. I wasn’t going to let any of the monsters from my past win, and I certainly wasn’t going to act selfishly, and potentially…

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  • Construction Zone

    This year, with God’s grace and guidance, I’ve decided to start putting money into this blog. With new features comes new themes, and I found one I fell in love with. Now comes the fun part, figuring out how to personalize it, and get it perfect for my blog. I know nothing about technology, and…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 13

    One morning, M woke up living the bachelor life, and that night he went to bed with me and my dog as his new roommates. My ex had finally scared me enough to flee the state, and seek safety in another. I didn’t tell anyone why I fled. Shame kept my mouth shut. I was…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 11

    He never saw the abuse. E wasn’t one to leave marks, and when E made his ‘official’ move on me, I went with it, and played the dutiful, happy girlfriend. It was easy, as I had become numb to life, and malleable. M didn’t like E, but he, like most others, never could have imagined…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 10

    Unbeknownst to me, E had been going around telling people that we were dating. He was marking his territory well before he made his first ‘official’ move on me. Looking back at the day I met M, it all becomes clear, but I was oblivious then. E had been warning me that M was an…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 9

    He wanted to meet my biological family, as I had somewhat of a dysfunctional relationship with them at the time. We flew to stay with them for a week or so. They all hated each other. E hated them because they were manipulative people. The irony is not lost on me. They hated him because…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 8

    E was annoyingly upbeat. He laughed loudly, and obnoxiously. He was musical, and endlessly talked about his gift of singing. He sang over every song, and has ruined my appreciation of certain artists to this day. He was loud in his love for God, which on its own is great. But when the person is…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 7

    Broken, hopeless, and even more angry than I had ever been, I moved back to my home state. I bought a small house that I had no desire to live in for long. God had taken so much from me, and I was determined not to stay on this earth for much longer. While I…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 6

    This post comes with a Trigger Warning. Part 6 is about being drugged and raped. This may be a long post, because I can’t split this one up. It’s too difficult to write about. After my husband died, a part of me went with him. I had an opportunity to leave the state and move…

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  • Terms and Conditions pt 5

    When I was a young teenager, I met my first husband. He was not much older than me. He was a light to my dark thoughts, and feelings. I had so much love for him, and I knew he loved me just as much. He never once took advantage of me. He was the first…

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