Growing up I wanted to be an actress. Being dramatic was second nature to me, and I loved attention. When I was in middle school, I made a heartbreaking discovery that caused me to abandon my limelight dreams. I cannot, for the life of me, cry on demand. For a young Marie, that was a devastating discovery, because if I can’t cry on demand, I cannot be the best of the best. It worked out, because now I prefer the quiet life, out of the limelight.

Walking out in public, especially alone, is like an acting job. I get to think of some tough guy or gal, channel them and become them. Instead of focusing on how dangerous my surroundings could be, and how anxious I feel, I focus on the calmness of the aforementioned, John Wick. I calm my heartrate, and act. Aside from this painfully hot summer, I usually go out looking put-together so I can gain some confidence from that as well.

This is what more people should be doing. Act like you’re someone to steer clear from. Act like you have nothing in the world to worry about because you are your own weapon, and you own wherever it is that you’re walking. Keep earbuds out of your ears, listen to your surroundings so you can hear everyone and everything going on around you. Hold your head high, make sure your posture is on point, and your eyes are forward. Confident people don’t have eyes that anxiously move around trying to spot danger.

When you get to your car, stay vigilant, and lock the door ASAP. I don’t even wait until I’m inside, as soon as I open my door I lock it. If I have to load my cars backseat, or trunk, I calmly put everything where I want it, shut the door, open up my door, hit the lock button, and get in. My face, and body language remain unconcerned the whole time.

This is the role of a lifetime. You’re auditioning for your life, potentially. It takes time, and a ton of practice, but I promise you that one day it will become second nature. Who knows, maybe some of that fake confidence will take root and blossom.